First problem: there’s still a magazine called Good Housekeeping.
Magazines and newspapers are dying left and right, the whole publishing industry is imploding, yet Good Housekeeping lives on? It survives not only to give women crucial tips on vacuuming, ironing, or what Febreeze actually is, but to produce a commemorative “125th Anniversary Collector’s Issue” graced with the creepiest cover photo of Michelle Obama I’ve ever seen.
This from Jezebel’s Jessica Coen:
The entire bottom half of Michelle’s face seems to have been replaced, her forehead has been nicely tightened, and the entire right (our left) side of her face seems to have scored some extreme chiseling. A solid helmet head and weird lighting finish off her look.
Michelle Obama is a stunning woman in every way– why did Good Housekeeping transform her into a waxy, Stepford wife, lips and teeth bossed and glossed, hands clasped primly just under the appropriately wifey headline: “Keeping her marriage close, raising her girls and overcoming her biggest fear.”
I’m so tired of the media’s abuse of first ladies, forever handicapped by that prissy label. When a woman finally becomes president, I can guarantee her “spouse” will never be referred to as the “first gentleman” without irony.
And on a day even further into the future than the debut of “Madame President,” people will look back on how women were photoshopped into drag queen aliens and be completely appalled this was considered “attractive.” The only modern invention more disturbing than these computer altered coverwomen, is the transformation that happens when a woman gets hired by Fox News. For more on getting “Foxified, see this post.