From the first time I saw FCKH8’s video, I really liked it. Perhaps, I’m a fan because of bias. When I started my blog, Reel Girl, I wrote on my “About” page:
One more reason I started Reel Girl– our movie rating system, and the values associated with that rating system, is totally messed up. So many G movies perpetuate the absolute worst kinds of gender stereotypes, yet they are supposedly “for kids.” In my opinion, this kind of repetitive imagery is way more dangerous for children than hearing the word “shit.”
“Cinderella” and all of its endless, infinite adaptations and reincarnations, in my opinion is bad for kids. “Whale Rider” in spite of swearing and drug use is good for kids. Simple concept, yet so hard to convince people of it, that I write and write and write. When I watched the FCKH8 video, I felt like: YES, this is the point I’ve been trying to make: Pay inequity is way more offensive than the word fuck. The video shows what I’ve been trying to tell. It is art. And unlike many writers out there, I am THRILLED when I see my idea coming from someone else as well because it makes me feel like I’m not crazy, like people ‘get it.’ Furthermore, I realize that in order for the world to change, people other than me have to ‘get it.’ If it’s just me with my ‘original’ idea that I’m going for, all I have is my ego, and that is a lonely, static, boring place to be plus nothing much changes at all.
So perhaps, I thought, when I read comments against the FCKH8 video by my brilliant colleagues including founder of Pigtail Pals Melissa Wardy, author of The Princess Problem Rebecca Hains, and author of Her Next Chapter Lori Day, I’m just being selfish here. I’m not thinking about the kids having no idea what they’re saying (and I do believe these girls are too young to understand what they’re talking about.) Perhaps I’m so happy not be so isolated with my vision, I’m blind to the exploitation, hypocritically exploitation I’m trying to prevent.
But after thinking this through, I still like the video. As I wrote, I agree the kids don’t understand what they are saying, this is a job for them. I never thought the kids in the ad were not acting or not reciting lines, and I don’t think the video’s intention is to make viewers assume that. So the question is: Does the ignorance of the kids make the video exploitative? My answer is still no, unless all child actors from the ones in sitcoms who speak in language far beyond their years to any commercial, all who often don’t understand what they are saying, are exploited.
The next question I asked myself: Is the FCKH8 ad exploiting girls because it’s using them to sell a product?
During the World Series last night and the night before, my family and I saw teen baseball star Mo’ne Davis in a Chevy ad. I thought the ad was beautiful. In the ad, Mo’ne says, “I throw 70 miles an hour. That’s throwing like a girl.” Millions of families saw her throw in a mini-movie and heard that line while watching the World Series. We also saw a Mazda ad with Mia Hamm, and my 11 year old, who is a fan of Hamm, said, “Why is she selling cars?” To which I responded, “It’s either her or a male athlete. I’d rather see Mia.” I want to see the images of powerful girls used to sell things, from toys to movies to clothing. These kids are not being exploited because they are being used to sell a product.
Rebecca Hains makes powerful points in her blog about the history of FCKH8:
The slogans found on the FCKH8 t-shirts were appropriated from other feminist nonprofits. For example, the Feminist Majority Foundation has been selling “This is what a feminist looks like” tees since at least the mid-1990s. So despite their promises to support charities with their t-shirt sales, FCKH8 is actually siphoning money away from feminist charities by stealing their ideas.
Furthermore, quality charities have refused to take FCKH8’s money in the past, because FCKH8 is incredibly problematic. They’ve been accused widely of being transphobic (as a quick google search will show), and their anti-racist work is of dubious merit. For example, their response to Ferguson raised so much ire in the anti-racist community that Race Forward—one of the charities originally listed on FCKH8’s page—announced publicly that they were refusing donations from the company.
So to those who are saying that FCKH8 is a company that’s doing it’s best to promote social justice, and we should cut them some slack? No FCKHing way.
I agree stealing a slogan from non-profits is not ethical. I also didn’t know about using the Ferguson tragedy to sell T shirts. FCKH8 sounds like a company with a bad history. But learning this history doesn’t change how I feel about the video. I still like the video. I still like that the video is going viral and, just like the Mo’ne ad, spreading important slogans out into the world:
* Pay inequality. Women are paid 23% less than men for the exact same fucking work.
*Women who graduate university with straight A’s get paid only as much as men who graduated with C’s.
* 1 out of every 5 women will be sexually assaulted or raped by a man
* Stop telling girls how to dress and start teaching boys not to fucking rape
*We’re glad a women’s right to vote is here, but equality is messed up. It’s walking to the car without fear.
* Pretty is a compliment but here’s how the focus works to girls detriment. Society teaching girls that our body, boobs, and butt are more important than our brains leads us to thinking our worth comes from our waistline. My aspirations in life should not be worrying about the shape of my ass so fuck focusing on how I look and give me a book.
*Instead of cleaning these girls mouths out with soap, maybe society should clean up its act.
*Near the end of the ad, there is a boy in a dress. “When you tell a boy it’s bad to act like a girl it’s because you think its bad to be a girl.”
These are messages I work hard every day to promote, and I believe the ideas are presented in this video in a simple, convincing way, easy for adults– yes, adults– to understand.
Rebecca posts comments on her blog from people who are offended that these young girls spoke of rape and assault. I agree that part is disconcerting, and it is for this reason, I chose not to show the video to my 11 year old daughter who I have yet to tell about rape. That said, I’ve blogged about books for kids that deal with rape, incest, and assault wondering what age is appropriate for these stories. The answer I always get is that it depends on the kid. I want to be the first one to tell my kid about rape, sexual assault, pornography, incest, drugs etc. I don’t want her learning about these issues for the first time from books or movies or other kids. When I’ve written about these kinds of books on my blog, kids and parents have written back that their young kid does know about porn or rape based on experiences that they’ve had– talking to other kids, what they’ve seen, or instances in their own life. Now that they do know, it is important and beneficial for the kid to be able to read literature about it. Here’s one comment that I got when I wrote about Graceling:
Based on the brief snippets of content she saw, I had to not only have “the talk”, but also explain a LOT of things I never thought I’d have to address at that age. Because of this, conversely, she is now very educated on both sex, misogyny, and rape/assault/child abuse. Therefore, I think these books that are written about very serious issues — but in the comprehension style of a young person who can find the characters identifiable — is a great source of information…I have not read these books to endorse them, but now I am interested and will be checking them out at the library. Thank you.
My point is that I don’t think it’s fair to make a blanket statement that little kids should not refer to rape or assault in a video when in the real world, kids see and experience these things every day.
One more thing: As far as the video not having a trigger warning, I don’t post trigger warnings on my blog ever. My whole blog is a trigger. Everyone is unique, and I think it’s impossible to make some kind of assumption about what will trigger readers.
If for some reason you haven’t come across the video, you can watch it here.
I was actually searching for an article that supports the video and am so happy you wrote this. I can’t help feeling as I have been sifting through all the angry and appalled articles/comments (from some really brilliant writers and reputable online publications, btw) that we are living in such a puritanical thinking society. I see this video as a great social experiment. If we can step out of the debate, out of whether or not them using 5 little girls to sell t-shirts by scripting them to swear is “right or wrong,” then what we have left is a bigger issue to dissect. People’s reacations to this video is what interests me more than the actual video. I could care less if 5 little girls used the f word when there are bigger fish to fry, like child hunger, child abuse, poverty, sexual assault…etc. that exists on a real level. Where is the outpouring of emotions and “viral” out cries over those issues? There have been a few, I know, but not on this level.
Another point I think that’s worth mentioning is that this video has really brought to light that the statistical reports on rape and wages are scewed. If true, then maybe this will light a fire under someone to create an accurate report and make that information easily accessible. Why had that not been done to begin with?
I must say I was very disappointed to read the article Ms.Magazine published on their website. This was an opportunity for one of the leaders in the feminist community to write a non-judgemental and unbiased commentary and show some of the things that could come from this that could be good for women (and men!). Like I said before, sort of focusing on the social experiment as a whole as opposed to dissecting whether it was right or wrong.
To your point about what we put out there for children to read and watch, I completely agree. If you’ve never watched the documentary on children’s book author/illustrator, Tom Ungerer, called “Far out Isn’t Far Enough,” you should definitely check it out. I’ve thought about some of the things he said in it throughout all this video debacle.
Anyhoo, thanks for writing an insightful albeit unpopular point of view about this topic. It’s appreciated by those of us that “get it.”
So…if we are appalled at this video and more importantly, the way this message is conveyed, then we are against equal rights for women? Unbelievable! We can’t be equally horrified by the rape of women, inequality of pay AND this vulgar video? Everyone associated with this video should be held accountable for Child Abuse! Just another group of scumbags, including the parents, of people exploiting children to make a point! Adults, stand up and fight your own fights – these ‘points’ are adult issues – fight for your children – DON’T make your children fight for you! And then make a profit on it!
I think kids at that age know what they’re saying. I would have at that age and we were part of the generation that was just starting to grow up with the internet. I remember dial up. I’m with you on the video. Just taking the video into consideration and not the organization or any of its questionable policies, I’m not offended. I’m less bothered by “bad words” and more bothered by words with hate behind them. There’s no hate in what they’re saying. Saying that they can’t say these words is putting them back into that same pretty princess role where they have to be cossetted and protected from the big, bad world. You don’t have to keep kids in ignorance. They’ll be more likely not to repeat curse words if you tell them what they are and that they’re not allowed to say those things at school for instance. At least, that’s my first memory of saying a “bad word.”
Fckh8 denies that asexuality and pansexuality are real and valid sexual identities. Fuck them. I’m asexual. I’m a real person. I exist. And I’m not the only one who’s pissed off.
Relevant to my post:
http://alittledashofwisdom.tumblr.com/post/100696934176/exposing-fckh8-because-feminists-are-spreading
Please don’t spread this FCK8H-bullshit anymore. They’re not for equality, they’re just trying to make money. Instead, educate children, grown ups and others who desperately need it.
You’ve been on TV because of your kid’s shoes, you can do even more. You’re the power mom we need. Don’t support organizations that deny the existence of someone just because they don’t understand it. Don’t support scammers.
Thanks for this. You expressed my reactions to the accusations of exploitation much more eloquently than I could have managed. I knew those words when I was younger than these girls – and not because someone wanted to make a video with real impact – so I am glad this is the way that those girls, at least, are learning it – in a video designed to maybe try and make a difference. I think the people upset by the swearing and use of the word rape are sort of completely missing the point of the video.
you said: ” I’m not thinking about the kids having no idea what they’re saying (and I do believe these girls are too young to understand what they’re talking about.)”
I have a 13 year old boy, and 8 year old boy / girl twins. They all know about misogyny, white privilege, wage gaps, etc. Including, at age appropriate levels, that some people hurt other people. They may not know the specific details of what a “rape” is, but they do know the word and some of the connotations behind it.
They also know, and use the phrase regularly, “yes means yes”. Do not assume that these girls don’t ‘get it’….because mine do. I will show this video to my teen. I have not decided whether I will show it to my 8 year olds…the jury is out since one of them is developing a potty mouth…
If we start in the teen years then we must first ‘unteach’ them over a decade of crap.
Unteaching is hard…especially when we must start by unteaching ourselves.