American moms shelling out thousands for girl babies

Slate reports on moms who are shelling out thousands of dollars to gender select girl babies in order to “balance families.”  Here’s a typical reason why moms want girls: “I’m not into sports. I’m not into violent games. I’m not into a lot of things boys represent and boys do…”

So what happens when your girl baby becomes a soccer star? Should she get a sex change operation?

WTF? This is Target’s gender segregated Jim Crow toy aisles run amuck.

Rebecca Traister tweets:

Do these moms know that not all of their daughters will like pink princesses and that some of their sons will?

Slate reports:

Gender selection now rakes in revenues of at least $100 million every year. The average cost of a gender selection procedure at high-profile clinics is about $18,000, and an estimated 4,000 to 6,000 procedures are performed every year. Fertility doctors foresee an explosion in sex-selection procedures on the horizon, as couples become accustomed to the idea that they can pay to beget children of the gender they prefer. Why not see who your kid grows up to be instead of deciding her personality for her? Can you try that, parents?

If this gender selection really happens, if parents promoting gender stereotypes are backed up and supported by the medical establishment, America is going to have a generation of confused, unhappy children.

Why not see who your child grows up to be instead of trying your hardest to decide all that for her? Can you try that, parents?

This blog, Reel Girl, is dedicated to imagining gender equality in the fantasy world. There isn’t a mom out there who hasn’t fantasized about who her baby is going be when she grows up. But what if moms tried harder, while doing all that fantasizing, to be a little more creative in what they imagine? I know it can be challenging when we’re surrounded by art, books, films, TV, science, and stores that relentlessly promote gender stereotypes. But what if moms, for example, instead of worrying that their kids might turn out gay, worked to create a world that treats gay people more fairly? Your kid is going to be who she is going to be, right? The best we can do is support them and help to provide real choices for them as their destiny unravels. If moms could truly imagine gender equality in the fantasy world, let it exist in our own heads, I have no doubt, we would change the world. And maybe that’s why it’s so scary to even try.

14 thoughts on “American moms shelling out thousands for girl babies

  1. To Hell with pre-determined sex roles (sure there are differences – learn to live with’em – and no ‘special’ game rules).
    Transexual surgery is a horrible FAD! Cosmetic surgery run amok – we should never have embraced it except for cases of true disfigurement.
    This FAD is going to turn gayness into a CORRECTABLE BIRTH DEFECT!
    In 50 years there is more acceptance of transexuality than gayness achieved in millennia! Why? Cause NOW you can PASS! Cause ‘gay’ is more threatening to the status quo than 2 people ‘passing’ as straight. Now you don’t HAVE to be gay anymore! This move deserves no more support from the gay community than skin-lightened blacks deserve support from blacks who chose to live as they were born.
    Steroid abusers can now play as ‘men’! What else should you call it? Why not have mixed sex teams? If you can cut it, you can play…..No steroids for anyone!

    And forget the nickname – I am a dyke who worked and paid to get us where we are and FOOLS are fucking things up with this B.S.!

    And for extra hate me points – LGBT? Not only does ‘T’ not belong (unless it stands for traitor) but WHY do we need to say ‘Gay AND lesbian’? Aren’t lesbians gay? Stupid, stupid, stupid. Gay men and women….say lesbian whenever – but NOT when it implies you are NOT part of ‘gay’!

      • I agree! Rigid sex roles hurt everyone – but I’m horrified to see babydykes convinced they were meant to be male…….Without those rigid roles I don’t think we’d see 1/10th as many people putting themselves through these risky, lifelong medical maintenance requiring procedures.
        And I don’t see trannsexuality weakening the rigid sex-roles, quite the opposite I’m afraid.
        I’m not as hostile as my original comment may have seemed – I see victims, not traitors – the LGBT thing just pisses me off.
        Thanks for your cordial reply………

  2. Not sure this could become a huge trend; most of the people I know who’ve had a child couldn’t care less if it was a boy or girl and certainly wouldn’t go to this extreme. That said, I will admit I wanted a girl but not because I bake. Hell, I baked with my son. And not because I’m not into sports. I rooted like a maniac at my son’s T-ball games. And I did cry when I had a boy instead of a girl…for about 10 minutes. when the time came to have a second child, we definitely sex selected–we adopted a little girl from China, who’s birth family, for whatever reason, couldn’t keep her. It cost a boatload of money, but so does any trip to China. I’ll never regret choosing a girl. She’s amazing; she’s into sports, music, her friends and, now that she’s older, my shoes. I’ll never regret having a son, either. He’s amazing, too. Thankfully, he doesn’t want to wear my shoes.

    • Hi jimlindy422,

      I can understand wishing for a boy or girl. I love having 3 girls and feel its my destiny in some ways but I can see how having a boy would be great as well, in part b/ they could all play together and support each other. Adopting a girl baby from China is very different from trying to gender select.


      • Yes, I know it’s very different from gender selection in the sense of paying someone to make sure you have a girl. BUT, this kind of stuff goes on in other places of the world in various forms. My daughter was available to me because someone in China decided that they wanted a boy so had to “get rid” of the girl in order to get permission to try again. In India, women have ultrasounds and abort female fetuses–not all women, but significant enough numbers that it’s a known problem. I chose to adopt, rather than getting pregnant again, because I wanted a girl. I couldn’t have aborted a male fetus. I didn’t have the money to pre-select sperm. All of the above are gender-selection. Do I think it’s wrong to pre-select sperm? I wish more people were open to adoption, then we wouldn’t have people spending money on creating designer children and we’d be creating homes for children who desperately need them. You want a girl? Adopt one. You want a boy? Adopt one.

    • evilqueencathy,

      I did not see that, but its all about disempowered women. Women aborting female fetuses in China is because women have such little power in the world. Women need reproductive rights in order to be empowered. The solution is not to work towards giving women more options.


      • Women aborting fetuses in China is not all of the Chinese problem. China does not have a social security system except for the ancient tradition of aging parents living with their son and his wife. No son? No social security. Put the one-child policy on top of that and you have a generation with no where to go if they have a daughter, who will be responsible for taking care of her husband’s parents. This is starting to change; there are fewer girls available for adoption from China. There are, however, lots of girls available for adoption in the US and it makes me sick that people would rather manipulate their bodies than make a family for a family-less child.

      • It starts so young too. My sil was just saying the other day how her daughter (1 and a half) acts like a boy. I worked at a daycare in the toddler room, and the teachers would talk negatively about toddler girls playing with all boys or comment if a girl was “actually dressed like a girl,” as one teacher put it. What’s wrong with all sexes being themselves?

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